


Balance of the Force

by Darth_Snips



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Original Trilogy, Star Wars Prequel Trilogy, Star Wars: Rebels, Star Wars: The Clone Wars (2008) - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Anisoka, F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-12-09
Updated: 2021-02-09
Packaged: 2021-03-09 19:27:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 13,450
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27981513
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Darth_Snips/pseuds/Darth_Snips
Summary: This story will take the reader through the tragic life of the chosen one, Anakin Skywalker, with some key events that differ from the current canon. As foretold, the chosen one will bring balance to the force but he will not be able to do it alone. Many events will match the current canon with only minor differences, but as the story unfolds it will completely diverge from canon. In some cases this story will skip around, in those cases you can assume that the events unfolded the way they did in canon. Full disclosure, this will end up being an Anisoka story.
Relationships: Anakin Skywalker & Ahsoka Tano, Anakin Skywalker & Shmi Skywalker, Anakin Skywalker/Ahsoka Tano, Obi-Wan Kenobi & Anakin Skywalker, Padmé Amidala/Anakin Skywalker
Comments: 29
Kudos: 72





	1. Humble Beginnings

**Author's Note:**

> Hello all. This is my first work. Really stepping out of my comfort zone here so I hope you enjoy it. I'm not really sure of the scope of this material yet. I have a very general plan for this story with a lot of twists I'm sure you will enjoy. Thanks! If anyone is interested in beta reading please shoot me an email at darthfulcrum66@gmail.com. Please be patient with me, I've got a lot on my plate at the moment.
> 
> Respective rights belong to Disney and Lucasfilm.

“Threepio, pass me that control linkage,” The young slave said to the barebones protocol droid that he had been working tirelessly on over the past few months. He knew that he needed to finish the droid as soon as possible to help his mother out with the household chores that clearly took a toll on her, but right now he was focused on the upcoming Boonta Eve Classic pod race.

Lying on his back looking up into his pod racer’s left engine he grinned as Threepio reached down to hand him a component that was obviously not a control linkage.

“Threepio, this is not a control linkage. This is a Vectro-Jet. Don’t worry I’ll get it myself, go back inside and see if mom needs any help with dinner,” he ordered as he dragged himself out from under the massive engine.

“Next priority is getting your vocabulator installed, I know you must have plenty to say,” He said half speaking to himself and half speaking to anyone that would listen.

Threepio gave a quick nod and shuffled his way through the sliding door leading to the Skywalker living quarters.

Standing up the boy paused his work and placed his hand on the pod racer’s engine staring up to the starry sky.

The door opened behind him and Shmi walked through. “Anakin, it's much too cold out here tonight you need to come back inside,” His mother said as she approached him draping a roughly knitted blanket over his shoulders.

“Is this really all there is? I feel like I’m meant for so much more,” He said not even noticing the temperature that had rapidly plummeted when the twin suns had set.

Bending down to meet his eyes Shmi said, “Your place is among the stars my son, I don’t know how you will get there but you _are_ meant for more than this. You will go many places and you will help the galaxy in countless ways.”

His mother always had a way of making him smile. “How can you know this?”

Shmi wrapped Anakin in a hug. “It’s just a feeling I have. I’ve never been more sure of anything in my life. When the time is right you will leave this place. Now come, dinner is ready, and I don’t want you catching a cold. The pod racer can wait.”

* * *

Anakin awoke early the next morning and rubbed his eyes trying to recall the extremely vivid dream he’d just had. He couldn’t remember all of the details, but he remembered a beautiful young woman accompanied by a middle-aged man with long graying hair. As far as he could remember, he had never seen either of the two before, but they somehow felt familiar. Despite not having any interaction with them in his dream, he somehow felt that they were in trouble and needed help.

Anakin got dressed and greeted his mother. “Good morning mom, I had the weirdest dream last night. I saw a young woman walking side by side with a long-haired man in robes. I think they were in danger. I saw them so clearly that I didn’t know I was dreaming.”

Raising an eyebrow Shmi said, “I’ve had my fair share of dreams like the one you speak of. Dreams can be a powerful thing. They can reveal your innermost desires and fears. In my experience, they can even give you hints about the future. We can discuss this further when you get home from work. I packed you some rations for lunch.”

Anakin nodded reluctantly and headed off to work at Watto’s scrapyard.

* * *

As soon as Anakin arrived at the scrapyard, he heard Watto calling for him. Anakin hurried into the shop to avoid being scolded only to find his master talking to the same beautiful woman and mysterious man that he had just seen in his dreams.

“Watch the store. I’ve got some selling to do,” Watto commanded throwing up a hand and flying out the back door with the man trailing behind him leaving Anakin and the girl alone.

“You’re the woman from my dreams.”

The young girl half-smiled at the boy. “What?”

Now more confident he replied, “I had a dream last night about you and your friend. I felt that you were in danger. And now here you are. That must mean something. Are you in danger?”

“How could you know that we were in trouble? We haven’t informed anyone of our situation.” Her voice had a slight tremble.

“I don’t know, it was just a feeling. I want to help you. What’s wrong?” Anakin replied.

"We need a new hyperdrive to get back to Coruscant. My name is Padme. What’s your name little boy?” She asked with a hopeful smile on her face.

“My name is Anakin Skywalker.”

* * *

The shop doors slid open and the mysterious man through them. "We better head back to the ship; Republic credits are no good here. The shop keeper cannot be persuaded to change his mind.”

Anakin quickly interjected, “There’s a sandstorm coming, you’ll never reach your ship in time. Sandstorms are extremely dangerous, come on I can take you to my place.”

The man sent Padme a questioning glance to which she replied with a nod. “Very well. We better get a move on.”

The three of them left the shop and started in the direction of the Skywalkers’ home.

“You know, I’m building a pod racer for the Boonta Eve Classic. I can get you that money for your hyperdrive.”

The man produced a genuine smile. “That’s very generous of you young man, I hope that it won’t come to that.”

As soon as the door to his house slid open, he called out to his mom, “Mom! I have friends with me. The same ones from my dream last night!”

Shmi entered the room and the man finally introduced himself as Qui-Gon Jinn.

Shmi was shocked to find that the people standing in her home were exactly as Anakin described them this morning.

“I’m building a droid. You wanna see?” Without waiting for an answer, he grabbed Padme’s arm and pulled her into the next room.

As the two approached the protocol droid sitting on the workbench, Anakin could hardly contain his excitement. It was rare that he was able to make new friends. "This is Threepio, I’m building him to help my mom,” Anakin said yanking the cover off the droid, exposing the wiring and inner workings.

A look of astonishment ran across Padme’s face. “You built him yourself?”

The boy beamed and eagerly nodded.

“He’s perfect,” Padme said in awe.

* * *

Qui-Gon enters the room to find Anakin rambling on about Threepio. “Thank you for offering us shelter Anakin. Your mother tells me you had a peculiar dream last night. Tell me about it.”

The young boy turned toward Qui-Gon. “Well, I saw you and Padme walking through the streets of Mos Espa. I knew you needed help; I could feel it. Now I understand that I’m meant to race in the pod race tomorrow to help you pay for your hyperdrive.”

Qui-Gon took a seat and stroked his graying beard. “These dreams, do you have them often?”

Anakin frowns and looks away from the man. “I have dreams quite often. I usually don’t remember them. When I was little my mom had me sketch my dreams so I wouldn’t forget them. Sometimes they are terrifying. My mom says that dreams are like windows to see your inner desires and fears. She also says that sometimes they can predict the future.”

Qui-Gon briefly paused before reaching into his cloak and pulling out his lightsaber. “Do you know what this is Anakin?”

The boy’s eyes widened and his mouth fell open. “Woah! That’s a laser sword! You’re a Jedi?”

The man nodded. "This is a lightsaber. Your mother is a very wise woman. Dreams to the average person often do not hold any particular significance. However, dreams of the Force-sensitive are often induced to give you warning about events that have yet to happen. I believe you are a very special boy Anakin. I think you could be the key to quite a few of our problems.”

“What is the Force?” Anakin asked in awe.

“The Force resides in all living things. Some of us feel its influence more than others. Have you ever known something was going to happen the instant before it happened?”

Anakin nodded.

“That is the force. I believe you are naturally gifted. With training you could learn to focus it and use it to help others. That’s why you are going to win the race tomorrow.”

Anakin perked up and asked, “So you’ll let me help you win the hyperdrive?”

Qui-Gon smiled at the boy and said, “I see no other choice. I believe that our paths were destined to intersect.”

* * *

Anakin wakes up on race day hardly able to contain his excitement. He enters the main area and finds his mother in tears.

The smile instantly faded from Anakin’s face. “What’s wrong mom?”

Shmi raised her head from her hands and faked a smile. “Don’t worry it was just a dream.”

Anakin prodded her trying to figure out what the dream was about. Shmi wasn’t going to tell him that he was the reason she was crying. In her dream she saw him fully grown. There was something strangely different about him. He wasn’t the sweet little boy that she had raised. He radiated pain. His eyes were not the deep blue that they normally were rather they were a bright golden-yellow. The memory sent shivers down her spine.

* * *

Anakin was making some last-minute adjustments to his pod racer when Qui-Gon walked up to him at the starting line. The Jedi lifted Anakin into the seat of his pod racer and said, “The Force will be with you, Anakin. Trust in it. It is yours to command.”

Anakin put on his helmet and nodded.

Qui-Gon made his way to the stands and took a seat between Shmi and Padme. “I believe your son is force sensitive. He is unlike anything I have ever seen. I’ve never seen so much raw potential in a child.”

A look of confusion passed over Shmi, “Are you saying that my Ani is a Jedi?” she asked.

Qui-Gon grinned and replied "He is not a Jedi. At least not yet. With your permission, I would like to take him back to Coruscant to train him in the Jedi ways.”

Sadness washed over Shmi, “I always knew he was meant for so much more. I do not want to part with him, but I feel that he does not belong here. I know he will do great things for the galaxy. I have no right to hold him here on Tatoonie,” She said as the crowd came to life and the race began.

* * *

The group rushed to the finish line to celebrate with Anakin.

“You did it!” Shmi exclaimed.

Qui-Gon helped Anakin down from his beaten-up pod-racer and said, “I knew you could do it.”

Anakin beamed, "I trusted in the force as you told me Qui-Gon. It felt like everything slowed down!”

Watto flew over to the crowd circling around Anakin. “You swindled me!”

Qui-Gon smiled at the Toydarian and replied, “This is the problem with gambling, Watto. Sometimes you win. Sometimes you lose.”

Throwing his hands up, Watto replied, “Very well. You may take the hyperdrive and young Skywalker just as we agreed.”

Anakin’s eyes widened and snapped to Qui-Gon. “You bet my freedom? I’m free? I’m free!”

Smiling Qui-Gon said, “Yes Anakin, you are free. You will come with us to Coruscant.”

Anakin suddenly stopped smiling and said, "What about my mother?"

Qui-Gon grimaced and said “I’m sorry, Watto wasn’t willing to part with her. We are unable to take her with us.”

* * *

As Anakin exited his home on Tatoonie for the last time, he stopped and turned to his mother. Shmi bent down to his eye level. “Ani, do you remember the dream of the Jedi you once had? You couldn’t have been more than five years old.”

The young boy scanned his brain but couldn’t recall the dream. “I’m sorry, mom. I don’t remember.”

Shmi gave him a reassuring smile. “It’s okay. This dream felt particularly important, so I had you sketch it. Reaching into her cloak she pulled out a folded piece of papyrus and handed it to Anakin.

Anakin looked at his mother curiously unfolded it. His eyes widened and heart started racing. The memories came flooding back to him. In the center of the canvas stood an orange skinned alien woman with white facial markings. Her white and blue lekku hung down well below her shoulders stopping just short of the two lightsabers that were attached to her waist. A white and green bird was perched on her outstretched arm.

The boy finally tore his gaze away from the drawing and looked up at his smiling mother. “Who is she?” he finally asked.

“I don’t know but I believe she will play a major role in your life. I have no doubt that you will cross paths with her. Take it with you to remember,” Shmi replied.

Anakin hugged his mother for the last time before leaving. Tears trailed down his face as he said, "I love you, mom. I'm going to come back for you."

Shmi couldn’t hold back the tears that welled up in her own eyes. “I know Ani, I’ll be here waiting. I’m so proud of you. I love you.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I decided to remaster the first few chapters of this work for better flow and easier reading. The overall story is the same but the I've tweaked the way it is presented.


	2. Dreams Part I

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Anakin has been having increasingly vivid dreams regarding his mother.

Anakin’s eyes snapped open and he frantically looked around his room. He was breathing heavily and drenched in sweat. Yet again, he had been jarred awake in the middle of the night by reoccurring dream. It must have been the fourth time this week.

The details of the dream were vague, but the urgency felt very real. He got out of bed and made his way over to his workbench and pulled out his sketch pad just as his mother had taught him all those years ago. He took the pencil and closed his eyes allowing the force to guide his hand. About half an hour later he opened his eyes to examine the sketch. It was his mother. Her expression was one of horror and she was grimacing in pain.

Flipping through the pages he compared this sketch with the ones from earlier that week. He noticed that her facial expressions were becoming more and more defined. Every iteration of the sketch made it seem like she was in more pain. It had to mean something.

He longed for the days when he simply had dreams of Padme. That was back when he could sleep through the night. Anakin flipped through the rest of the pages of his sketch pad briefly glancing at his sketches of Senator Amidala before finally landing at his most mysterious sketch. He stared at the female Togruta on the page and she stared back at him.

“Who are you?” He muttered.

* * *

He let out a sigh and decided to go get something to drink from the mess hall to clear his head. He grabbed a shirt from the ground and threw it on before tapping a button on the keypad. A panicked gasp caught his attention as he walked out the door. Almost tripping over herself a young Togrutan girl scrambled to her feet and tried to scurry off down the hallway.

“Stop!” he shouted causing her to quickly come to a halt. She shyly turned around trying not to make eye contact with him.

It was clear that he was making her nervous even though that wasn’t his intent. He calmly asked, “Who are you?”

“I’m nobody, I shouldn’t have been here. I’m sorry Master Skywalker.” Her voice trembled.

“I’m no master or even a knight yet. Just call me Anakin. How did you know my name?”

She raised a white marked eyebrow at him. “Seriously? Everyone knows who you are. You’re Anakin Skywalker. You’re the chosen one.”

His expression hardened. “I hate that title. I never asked for it. It’s only ever been a burden.”

Eyes widening in disbelief she replied, “You can’t be serious, anyone would love to have that title.” In just a few words she had masterfully shifted the conversation to make him feel as if he was the one being questioned.

Anakin smiled at the young Togruta. “Oh no you don’t. You’re not going to flip the conversation around on me. Why were you sitting outside my quarters this late at night?”

She racked her brain trying to think of a good excuse. “I was uh… hungry, I needed a snack.”

Grinning and shaking his head he replied, “Your lying needs work. I can sense that you are not telling the truth, you need to work on your shields young one. Don’t worry you’re not in trouble.”

Most of her anxiety faded away. “I haven’t been able to sleep much at all this week. I’m not sure what’s happening to me but I’m very sorry for disturbing you this late. It wasn’t my intention to fall asleep for you to find me this time.” Her lekku brightened as she realized that her tongue had betrayed her.

“Wait, this isn’t the first time you’ve been outside my door? I’ve never noticed you before, but you still haven’t explained why you’re here.”

She finally realized she wouldn’t be able to skirt around the truth any longer. “About a week ago I was jarred awake by a flood of anxiety and fear. When I finally calmed down and reached out with the Force, I noticed that the emotions weren’t coming from me. It felt as if the Force was leading me here. Now that I’m here I sense that the emotions were coming from you.”

Anakin’s face turned a crimson red. “I’m sorry, I had no idea I was projecting my emotions in my sleep.”

The young Togruta sent him a warm smile. "Don’t be sorry. I’m only here because I wanted to help."

“I’ve been having dreams. Thank you for your concern, I’m sure they mean nothing.” Anakin appreciated the fact that she seemed to genuinely care about his wellbeing but didn’t feel comfortable telling her more.

“Again, I’m sorry for disturbing you, if you ever do decide you want to talk about it, I’ll be here,” She said as she started to return to her quarters. She was disappointed that he wouldn’t reveal any more about his dreams, but she was glad to get out of the situation without really being scolded.

Feeling unsure about the whole situation Anakin asked, “What’s your name?”

She briefly stopped and turned to face him. “Ahsoka, my name is Ahsoka Tano,” she said as she disappeared back to her room. 

Scratching his head over what had just transpired he went back into his room and realized that he never got the drink that he originally left to get. Shrugging, he got back into bed and slept the whole night through.

* * *

Upon waking up a few days later he realized that he had overslept. The dreams had not gotten better, in fact, they had gotten worse. He could not sleep the whole night through. When he couldn’t sleep at night, he would check outside his door looking for the young Togruta but was disappointed to find that she hadn’t come back. His dreams were getting increasingly vivid and increasingly morbid.

Throwing his padawan robes on and rushing out of his quarters he is stopped immediately by Obi-Wan who was standing outside of his door with his arms crossed.

"Anakin, this is the third time this week you've overslept and missed our morning meditation session. I'm beginning to question your commitment," Obi-Wan said.

Looking down toward the floor Anakin replied, “I know master. I am truly sorry. I haven’t been able to get a full night’s sleep for a while now. Ever since the dreams started.”

“Are you still having the dreams about your mother?” Obi-Wan asked.

“Yes, they’re getting increasingly vivid. I’m starting to worry.”

“Anakin I’ve told you time and time again that you need to sever your attachment with your mother. It will only bring you pain.”

“I don’t want to avoid the pain. I just want to make sure my mother isn’t in pain.”

Obi-Wan placed a hand on Anakin’s shoulder. “My young padawan, you have much to learn. The dreams will fade in time. Go now and we will regroup after you get some breakfast.”

“Yes Master,” Anakin said bowing his head.

* * *

The lightsaber instructor, Cin Drallig, flagged down Anakin as he was walking to his room. “Padawan Skywalker, do you have a moment?” 

Anakin was slightly annoyed because he knew he was about to be sucked into something he didn’t want to do. “Sure, Master Drallig _._ What do you need?”

“I was hoping you’d have a minute to help with the younglings Form V instruction. Although you are a padawan I feel that you have truly mastered this aspect of your training and I am getting far too old for this kind of instruction.”

“I don’t know Master Drallig _._ Surely there must be someone else who is more qualified to teach them. I also have to meet Master Kenobi momentarily,” He said as he scanned the room and saw all the young faces that eagerly gazed back at him before he spotted a short Togrutan girl in the back that refused to meet his eyes. His mood lightened the moment he saw her.

“Very well padawan Skywalker. You may go and meet Master Kenobi if you need to,” replied Drallig turning back around to face his class of students.

Anakin smiled at Drallig and the students. "Actually, I don't need to meet Master Kenobi until a bit later. I have some downtime to help you."

Drallig took a few steps backward to allow Anakin to take over. “Outstanding, you may begin when you are ready.”

Anakin quickly counted the number of students in the room and saw that there was an odd number. “Alright students, please pair up for some peer-to-peer sparring,” he said as the younglings quickly paired up with their friends leaving Ahsoka standing alone trying to mask her hurt.

"Tano, you're with me," Anakin said as all the younglings turned toward her to express their jealousy.

Everyone in the temple could identify Anakin Skywalker simply because he was the chosen one. However, very few people in the temple _knew_ Anakin Skywalker. Even his own Master did not truly know him. It seemed that everyone in the temple either despised him out of jealousy, feared him because of his potential, or placed vastly unrealistic expectations on his shoulders.

Ahsoka got a mischievous grin on her face when Anakin approached. “So we meet again Skyguy.” Several younglings snickered at the comment.

Anakin clenched his jaw. “What did you just call me? Don’t get snippy with me little one,” he snapped.

Her grin instantly disappeared. "I'm sorry, just trying to get in your head as Master Drallig instructed.”

His warm smile returned to his face. “I know Snips, I’m doing the same thing. Can you meet me later? Outside my quarters. I have something to discuss with you.”

“I guess I can make an appearance. What’s wrong?” She said as she settled into a reverse grip Form V stance.

“This is not the time or the place to discuss it, but I think I’m ready to talk about my dreams,” He said moving into his signature stance. “For now, show me what you got Snips, and don't hold back,” flashing her a mischievous smile and igniting his lightsaber.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry I'm late with this chapter. It may not be my best work. My girlfriend was in a pretty severe car crash the other day. She's doing well. The remainder of the story will be dedicated to her.


	3. Dreams Part II

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Anakin has a few important encounters that will impact his decisions in the coming chapters.

Shortly after midnight, Anakin heard a knock at his door. He anxiously stepped outside to meet her. “Please come in.”

Ahsoka gave him a look of concern. “What’s got you so shaken?”

“It’s my mother. I’m worried about her.”

“Why? What happened?” Ahsoka’s concern was starting to grow by the second. She’d never seen this side of him. He was nervous and his voice was shaky. He seemed so vulnerable, much different from the fearless Padawan that was the daily gossip through the temple.

“I’m not entirely sure. Ahsoka, before I tell you please promise me that it stays between us.”

She almost looked offended. “Of course, I will keep it between us. I’m only here to help, I have no right to tell others your business.”

He couldn’t hold it all in anymore. “The dreams I’ve been having are about my mother. They’re getting worse. I can’t concentrate. I can’t sleep. It’s all I can focus on.”

Ahsoka raised a white-marked eyebrow. “What happens in these dreams?”

“At first I was just seeing her. I wasn’t sure what it meant. But now I can feel that she is in pain. She is suffering. I don’t know what has happened, but I just feel that I need to go check on her.” He couldn’t help but shutter at the thought of his mother being in danger.

“Well, have you tried talking to the council?”

Anakin tensed up briefly but then let out a sigh. “You don’t understand. They won’t listen. The council only cares about themselves. Master Kenobi won’t even take the time to hear me out. You’re still young Ahsoka. There’s a lot you don’t understand about the Jedi yet. They’re not the same Jedi that you hear about in the stories.”

She tilted her head to the side. “What do you mean by that?”

He could sense that she was truly interested in what he had to say. “I don’t like talking about my past, but I will tell you this much. When I chose to leave my mother to become a Jedi, I thought that I would be doing real good. I aspired to free slaves and fight injustice all over the galaxy. Now I am approaching the end of my years as a Padawan and none of that has come to fruition. The Jedi only serve as a tool of the Republic. People who aren’t a part of the Republic don’t stand a chance of getting our help no matter how badly they need it. The Jedi have a duty to protect all life, but I feel that far too often we pick and choose which lives are more valuable to us.”

“Perhaps they’ve lost sight of their true purpose over the years. Maybe the Jedi just need to change. You could be that change from the inside.”

Anakin faked a smile. “You have wisdom beyond your years young one. You are going to make an excellent Jedi one day.”

Ahsoka beamed at the sardonic compliment. “Thank you. I wish there were some way for me to understand what you see in your dreams.”

After a few moments of silence, he had an idea. “Well, there is a way. Sometimes I draw sketches of my dreams to help me remember them.”

“Well, what are you waiting for? Let me see them.”

He shifted uncomfortably. “Hold on Ahsoka, these are very personal to me. I’ve never shown them to anyone.”

She could sense that he was nervous about showing her his sketches, but she couldn’t pass up the opportunity to tease him. “Do you have something to hide Skyguy? I’m just trying to help, but I guess if you don’t want help, I can go.” She started to stand up even though she had no intention of leaving. Anakin grabbed her arm to stop her.

"Okay, okay. I'll show you. But take a seat while I get them out." He had no desire to show her the private sketches but at this point he was desperate for someone to understand. He shuffled to his desk, grabbed his sketchpad and sat down beside her.

Ahsoka reached out to take the sketchpad from him but he quickly pulled it away. She almost looked hurt that he didn’t trust her. “Anakin, please trust me. I only want to help you.”

He sighed again and opened the sketchpad up to Shmi’s section before reluctantly giving it to her. She ran her hand over the sketch. “This is your mother? What’s her name? What is she like?”

“Her name is Shmi. She’s wonderful. She was the only one that always believed in me. She— I’m sorry I can’t. I don’t like talking about my past.”

Ahsoka stole a curious glance at him and continued flipping through the pages. “Maybe another time then.”

He shook his head. “I doubt it. I shouldn’t be this attached to my former life or my mother. It’s not the Jedi way.”

“Well, like it or not you are attached to her. I don’t remember my mother; I was so young when Master Plo found me.”

Suddenly it was clear to her why Anakin was so worked up. His mother appeared to be in excruciating pain. Ahsoka glanced back up to his face and noticed he was refusing to look. His sadness was starting to become her own. “I see what you mean now. I’m sorry. Maybe you should show this to Master Yoda.” Ahsoka flipped one more page and saw a radically different sketch.

“Who is this?”

Snapping out of it he felt the blood rush to his cheeks. He snatched the sketchpad from her hands. “Ahsoka! I told you these were personal! Give it back!” As much as he wanted to be angry with her, he simply couldn’t. He was far too upset about his mother and Ahsoka was the only one who seemed to care. He couldn’t risk pushing her away.

“My dreams weren’t always sad, you know. This is Senator Amidala of Naboo. I used to dream about her a lot.”

Ahsoka looked back up to Anakin’s face. For a split second she thought she saw a smile. “She’s beautiful. Do you have feelings for her?”

He could sense that she was just curious and that she wasn’t going to lecture him. “I haven’t seen her in almost ten years. Besides, Jedi aren’t allowed to have feelings.”

Ahsoka frowned at him. “If you don’t care about people then you can’t very well be a Jedi.”

“That is a dangerous line of thinking Ahsoka, but I don’t disagree with you.”

His expression lightened up a little more. Maybe he really could trust her. Anakin considered Obi-Wan a friend but there were many things he couldn’t confide in him. Obi-Wan would always choose his Jedi responsibilities over his responsibilities as a friend. Soon he found himself lost in conversation and for the first time in a long time he was given some peace. He finally had someone to talk to. 

…

Anakin fumbled with his sketchpad and pulled out a folded canvas. “Come take a look at this, I want to show you something.”

Ahsoka curiously slid a little closer to him as he unfolded the canvas. Her eyes lit up when she saw it. This time she really couldn’t resist teasing him.

“Woah, I didn’t know you had a thing for Togruta’s too.”

His face turned red again. “What? I mean I don’t! I drew this when I was a child. I don’t even know who it is. I was hoping you could help me figure it out but if you’re going to be like that then just forget it.”

Ahsoka couldn’t stop herself from bursting out in laughter at his defensiveness. She gave him a light-hearted punch on the arm. “I’m just messing with you.” She took a closer look at the sketch. The details were incredible, it was so realistic she couldn’t believe that a child did this. Anakin watched her intently as she scanned the sketch. He hadn’t quite gotten over his embarrassment when Ahsoka let out a gasp.

“What is it?”

“Look at her markings!”

“Yea, what about them? Don’t all Togruta have markings?”

“Yes, but they are all different. They’re like fingerprints, no two are alike. Look closely at her markings and then look at me.”

Anakin still wasn’t following. He looked down and studied the drawing then looked back to Ahsoka. His jaw dropped and suddenly he understood what she was getting at.

“They’re just like yours!”

“I know!” She looked back at the drawing and gasped again.

“Did you find something else?”

“The date! That’s when I was born!”

“Are you serious?”

“Yes!”

“I wonder what it all means.”

Ahsoka gasped one more time.

“What is it this time?” He didn’t know if he could handle another revelation tonight.

She scrambled to her feet and quickly headed for the door. “I have to go before they notice I’m gone! We will have to pick this up another time.”

Anakin glanced at the chrono and his eyes widened when he saw the time. To his surprise they’d been chatting for hours. He didn’t feel quite as bad when he was talking to her.

Anakin rose to his feet. “Ahsoka.”

She turned back to him. “Yes?”

He couldn’t help but smile. “Thank you, my friend.”

She broke into a smile herself before saying, “You’re welcome,” and heading out the door.

* * *

“Welcome Padawan Skywalker. Something on your mind you have?” Yoda asked.

“Master Yoda, I have something urgent to talk to you about,” Anakin replied.

“Yes, yes. Sit, you must. Discuss these matters we will.”

After pacing anxiously for a few seconds Anakin finally sits in a chair across from Yoda. “Master, I’ve had dreams ever since I can remember. My mother used to tell me that sometimes dreams could give you a peek into the future."

The green creature’s eyes went wide. “Careful when sensing the future, you must be. To the Jedi powerful tools dreams can be. Occupy your thoughts your mother does?”

Anakin glanced at the ground “Yes Master. I know this is not the Jedi way.”

“The reason you come, this is not.”

"I’ve been having vivid dreams recently. My mother is in pain. She’s frightened, I can feel her fear. I seek permission to go investigate this matter.” His voice was desperate.

"Sure you are that the fear you feel is your mother's and not your own?"

“I’m sorry, I’m not following Master. What do you mean?”

“Fear is the path to the dark side. Fear leads to anger, anger leads to hate, hate leads to suffering. A great deal of fear I sense in you Padawan Skywalker.”

"I am not afraid for myself I am afraid for her. She could be suffering Master! All I ask is that I am permitted to check on her. Please master." He was on the brink of tears. It felt so helpless to ask the Jedi anything like this. He already knew what Yoda was going to say. There was no point in asking. The Jedi are a lot of things, but they are not sympathetic.

“Fear of loss is still fear. Severed must be the attachment to your mother. Learn to control your emotions in time you will. Dismissed you are.”

Although he had much more to say he knew that it would be no use to argue his point. Bowing his head, Anakin says, “Thank you Master. I understand,” clearly biting his tongue.

* * *

“Anakin Skywalker, please come in my friend. It’s good to see you,” said the frail old man reaching out his hand toward Anakin.

“Hello Chancellor, it’s nice to see you again too. You called for me?” He replied taking Palpatine’s hand and shaking it.

The chancellor smiled warmly at him. “Ah yes, I simply wanted to check in on you. It has been a while since we have spoken. It seems that your Jedi training is advancing at a rapid pace, I’m beginning to hear stories of your successes from all over the galaxy.”

Anakin faked a smile. He didn’t care about the recognition, he only wanted to help his mother. “Thank you, I’m glad that my efforts are being noticed.”

“Is something wrong my young friend?” Palpatine asked innocently.

“I’m sorry Chancellor, I’ve been having dreams of my mother. Truthfully, I am scared that she may be in danger. Master Yoda has forbidden me from going to check on her.”

“And you? What do you think my young friend?”

“I think she needs help, but I would be foolish to disobey an order from Master Yoda.”

Palpatine brought the tips of his fingers together. “Have you ever heard the expression 'it's easier to ask for forgiveness than permission?' You need to understand that I'm not encouraging you to disobey the Jedi. I’m only asking you to consider the consequences if you don’t help her. From what I know of the Jedi I know that their dreams have meaning and can show you the future.”

He sat in Palpatine's office silently for the next few minutes pondering what he had just said.

Finally, the old man broke the silence. "I do apologize my friend, but I must send you on your way. I must prepare for a meeting on the Senate floor."

Anakin stood up and gave a small bow. “Thank you, Chancellor, your wisdom and friendship mean more than you know.”

“The pleasure is mine my boy. Keep in touch,” said Palpatine as Anakin walked out the door.

* * *

He only got several steps away from the chancellor’s office before he was stopped in his tracks by a vaguely familiar voice.

“Ani?”

He turned and spotted the source of the voice and instantly his face lit up in awe.

“Senator Amidala, what a pleasure seeing you here.”

“My goodness Ani, you’ve grown!”

Anakin was starstruck. “You’ve grown too, more beautiful I mean.” He cringed at what he’d just said knowing he should’ve picked his words better.

Padme smiled awkwardly at him clearly trying to ignore his previous statement. “You’ll always be that little boy from Tatoonie. It’s good to see you Ani, but what are you doing here?”

“Chancellor Palpatine requested my presence. He’s a good friend of mine.”

“That’s great to hear. Everyone needs a friend like the Chancellor. I'm actually on my way to speak to him right now about a relief bill for a few planets in the outer rim."

“I’m glad to see that you care about everyone who is in need. Not just the ones that are a part of the republic.”

This time Padme’s smile was genuine. “I wish everyone saw it that way. Many believe that my loyalties lie outside the republic because I want to help everyone in need. I have always held the belief that if I can help someone worse off than me then I will. No matter the cost."

The light from outside was shining onto her face bringing out the color in her eyes. He simply couldn’t help himself from matching her warm smile. “You’re so beautiful Padme.”

Padme looked a bit flustered before she found her words. “Anakin, this is inappropriate. Please don’t look at me like that.”

“Look at you like what?” asked Anakin innocently but he didn’t shift his gaze.

Her voice quivered and she couldn’t turn away from his deep blue eyes. “Like that, you’re making me uncomfortable.”

“I’m sorry. It was nice to see you again Padme, I hope our paths cross again soon, but I must be getting back to the Temple. Master Kenobi hates it when I’m late.”

Deep in thought, she nodded as he turned to walk away. "I hope our paths cross again too," she murmured.

He walked silently down the hall back to the temple. His mind was on many different things. Chancellor Palpatine had seemingly encouraged him to disobey the direct order from Master Yoda. Not only had the Chancellor encouraged him to disobey but Padme had as well, albeit inadvertently when she told him how she feels it is her responsibility to help others. Maybe he should talk to Ahsoka again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays to all. The next chapter may be a little be later as I have a bunch of obligations coming up. Hope you're all enjoying this as much as I am. The next few chapters are about to get crazy. Any feedback would be greatly appreciated. I’m trying to improve my work so please let me know what I can do to make it better. This chapter has been remastered.


	4. The Senator Part I

He and Obi-wan had just returned from a border dispute on Ansion with Master Unduli and her Padawan Barriss Offee. He was so exhausted. And hungry. But then again, he was always hungry. Anakin made his way to the mess hall, grabbed a plate of food, and sat down at a table alone. He always ate alone minus the few times when Obi-Wan ate with him, not that he minded, he enjoyed being alone.

Not much later he sees a familiar face across the mess hall. Two familiar faces actually. Ahsoka and Barriss were making their way through the line to get food, it was apparent that they were good friends given the way they were talking. After getting food the two young ladies went their separate ways.

Ahsoka scanned the room looking for a place to sit when she saw Anakin sitting alone. She walked to the seat across from him. “Is this seat taken?”

Anakin gave her a friendly smile. “It is now. Have a seat,”

She returned the smile. “Barriss told me that your mission to Ansion was a success. Congratulations.”

“Thank you, it certainly wasn’t easy, but we got through it. I didn’t realize that you and Barriss were close.”

“Oh yea, Barriss and I have been friends for a long time now. She was just about the only youngling that was nice to me. We rarely have time to speak since she became Master Unduli’s Padawan,” Ahsoka signed and looked down. “I’m ready to become a Padawan. I know I am. I don’t think Master Yoda agrees.”

“Don’t worry Snips. Keep your head up, you will get your chance soon enough. Its not all its cracked up to be.”

Curiously, she asked, “What do you mean? You get to go places and do important things.”

“Yes, it is nice to be able to visit other planets and I do like that feeling of purpose, but it feels like I am rarely able to stop. I am always on the move, one thing after another. Trust me, enjoy your down time now because soon you won’t have any of it.”

“How long until you are knighted?” She asked.

He frowned, “I don’t know, Master Kenobi doesn’t think I’m ready for the trials despite me saving his skin no less than 10 times.”

Ahsoka grinned at him mischievously. “You need to stop slacking and move on to the next phase so I can have a well-respected Master to take me as a Padawan.”

Anakin replied, “That shows how much you know, I’m not well respected.”

She snickered. “Oh yea, I know. I was talking about Master Kenobi.”

He gave her a dirty look. “Here we go again with the snippy comments. I was beginning to wonder where Ahsoka was.”

She smiled briefly but let it fade. “Are you still having dreams about your mother?” she asked intently.

Sadness clouded over him. “Yes, I am. I haven’t noticed it as much in the past few days probably because I was distracted with my mission. I wanted to go make sure she is okay but Master Yoda wouldn’t allow me,” He replied.

“I can sense her pain through you. Maybe you should consider taking this up with Master Kenobi. Ask him for help, tell him what you told me,” she said.

Anakin raised an eyebrow. “You can sense her pain through me? How? I have my shields up, you shouldn’t be able to see through them.”

Ahsoka smiled at him. “Maybe we just have a connection Skyguy.”

Obi-Wan walked into the mess hall and approached them. “Hello there! Anakin, who’s your friend?” he asked.

Anakin was about to answer when Ahsoka spoke up, “I’m Ahsoka Tano.”

“It’s a pleasure to meet you Ahsoka. I do apologize but I’m going to have to steal your friend away.”

She sent Anakin a playful grin. “That’s okay, I was getting tired of talking to him anyway.”

Rolling his eyes he said, “Hey, you came to me Snips.” Anakin looked up at Obi-Wan and asked, “Do we really have another mission already?”

“Not to worry my friend, I think you will enjoy this assignment. We have been asked to protect a certain Nubian senator.”

Anakin’s face lit up as he asked, “Padme?” Swiftly standing up “When do we begin?” he asked. “Bye Ahsoka, I hope to see you around.” He followed Obi-Wan out of the mess hall.

Sitting alone at the table Ahsoka rolled her eyes and finished her meal.

* * *

He and Obi-Wan were in the elevator on the way to Senator Amidala’s when the nervous jitters hit him.

“You seem a little on edge,” Obi-Wan said.

“Not at all.”

“I haven’t seen you this tense since we fell into that nest of Gundarks.”

Anakin laughed. “You fell into that mess Master, I simply jumped in to rescue you.”

Obi-Wan gave a half-smile. “Oh yes, I guess that is what happened.” Obi-Wan laughed. “You’re sweating, take a deep breath. Relax.”

“You’re right Master. If I’m going to have a chance with her, I can’t be sweating like this.”

Obi-Wan looked at him and laughed again then shook his head quietly. “You know Jedi are not permitted to have attachments Anakin. Keep your wits about you.”

“I was only joking Master,” stated Anakin.

If only he was joking.

* * *

Soon after arriving on Naboo Anakin and Padme made their way to the throne room to discuss her security. After a brief discussion everyone agreed they would be safest in the lake country.

Making their way up the stairs Padme stopped and leaned against the balcony overlooking the lake and said, “We used to come here on school trips and swim all day. I loved the water. Afterwards we’d lie in the sand and let the sun dry us off.”

Anakin dropped their luggage and joined her in leaning on the balcony. “This place is astonishing. The water is so beautiful. All I knew on Tatoonie was sand. Water is so full of life while sand is void of it.” He looked into her eyes and took her hand. “Water and sand are polar opposites much in the same way that we are. You were born royalty while I was born a slave. When I was growing up on Tatoonie I dreamed of visiting planets like this. Now I dream of you. You are a reminder of everything that I strive to achieve,” he said leaning in for a soft kiss.

Padme leaned in to meet his lips but pulled away at the last second and stood up straight. “Anakin, I want this. I do. But we can’t. We have responsibilities.”

He stepped back from the balcony and grabbed her luggage. “You’re right Senator Amidala. I’m sorry. Where do you want your luggage?”

Her face a crimson red, Padme stepped away from the balcony. “Follow me, you can set it in my room. You can make yourself comfortable in the room down the hall.”

* * *

Sweat glistened on his body as he tossed and turned in his sleep. “No! NO! MOM!” Suddenly Anakin’s eyes snap open and his heart is pounding. This dream was far worse than the others. It somehow felt more desperate. His mother is in so much pain and he is powerless to help her. No! He is a kriffing Jedi. He can help her. He will help her.

He really wished Ahsoka was there. He could talk to her. She would understand or at least attempt to.

Master Yoda’s words crashed over his mind _,_ “Severed must be the attachment to your mother. Learn to control your emotions in time you will.” How could he be so cold? As a matter of fact, how could all of the Jedi be so cold? Even his own master, the man he considered to be his best friend and his brother, had told him that he should rid himself of his attachment with his mother.

He stood up and walked out of the house to the balcony overlooking the lake and attempted to put himself into a meditative state. He recalled the Jedi Code that had been endlessly drilled into his head.

_There is no emotion, there is peace._

But how can you achieve peace without emotion? Isn’t emotion what gives peace?

_There is no ignorance, there is knowledge._

How can there be no ignorance if the Jedi believe that their way is the only way?

_There is no passion, there is serenity._

Serenity. What is serenity but a product of love? What is love without passion?

_There is no chaos, there is harmony._

Chaos is destructive by nature; harmony is helpful by nature. Harmony is made possible through personal connections. How can there be personal connections without emotion?

_There is no death, there is the Force._

Jedi may transform into the force when they die but what comfort does that give to someone who isn’t a Jedi?

He stood in silence gazing off into the distance of the deep greenish blue lake in front of him unable to clear his mind. The sun peaked through the clouds making all the colors vibrant. It was so different than his home planet. Under normal circumstances he could appreciate the stark differences between Naboo and Tatoonie but at the moment all he could think about was his mother.

Padme steps out of the broad French doors and notices Anakin quietly staring off into the distance. Not wanting to disturb him she turns to walk away.

“Don’t go,” said Anakin despite not moving a muscle.

“I don’t want to disturb you.”

Anakin’s voice wavered. “Your presence is soothing. Please stay.”

“You had another nightmare last night?” Padme asked.

Turning to face her, his voice trembled. “I saw my mother, she’s suffering Padme. I saw her as clearly as I see you now,” He took a deep breath. “She’s in pain. I know I’m disobeying my mandate to protect you, but I have to go. I have to help her.”

Padme gave a supportive smile. “I’ll go with you.”

His jaw clenched. “I’m sorry, I don’t have a choice.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry it took so long to get this chapter out. Life got kind of crazy. There is a lot of action coming up in the subsequent chapters. If anyone is interested in beta reading please shoot me an email at darthfulcrum66@gmail.com. Hope you all enjoy!


	5. Tragedy on Tatoonie

The first thing he noticed when he stepped out of Padme’s H-Type yacht was the nearly unbearable heat. Although he greatly missed his mother, he did not miss this planet. In fact, he despised the planet and almost everyone on it.

Walking out of the spaceport Anakin flagged down a taxi droid and they made their way to Watto’s shop.

Upon arriving outside of Watto’s shop Anakin stepped out of the carriage and offered his hand to Padme. The memories began flooding back to him when he got a whiff of that all too familiar stench. He certainly hadn’t missed that. His former master was so hard at work trying to repair a pit droid head that he hadn’t noticed the young Jedi standing in front of him. “I’m looking for Shmi Skywalker,” he said.

Looking up from the droid Watto laughed. “Why would anyone be looking for Shmi Skywalker? You’re a funny man. Wait. Ani? Little Ani?”

Anakin bit his tongue and nodded.

“You’ve sure grown up. Look at you, a Jedi, whattaya know. Maybe you could help me with a few deadbeats who owe me some money.”

Anakin ground his teeth trying to restrain himself. “I was a slave once; I will not be a slave again. Where is my mother?”

Watto flew up to eye level and let out a laugh and said, “Foolish Ani, we are all slaves. You don’t realize that you’re a slave to the Jedi now.”

He took a menacing step toward the Toydarian. “Enough of this Watto. Where is my mother?”

Flying backward Watto replied, “There’s no need to cause trouble. I don’t know where Shmi is. I sold her years ago.”

Anakin grimaced. “You sold her?” 

“Yes, yes. You understand. Business is business.”

He balled his right hand into a fist causing Watto to nervously shift. “Actually, I don’t understand. I don’t understand why scum like you think that slavery is remotely acceptable. Who did you sell her to?”

“A moisture farmer named Lars. At least I think it was Lars. Believe it or not I heard he feeds her and married her.”

“Do you know where they are?”

“Somewhere on the other side of Mos Eisley. I can check my records.”

“I would appreciate that,” said Anakin almost threateningly.

Watto flew inside of his shop leaving the pair of them outside.

Padme placed her hand on Anakin’s arm and said, “Anakin, try to stay calm. It’s much more likely that people will help us if you treat them kindly.”

He turned to meet her eyes. “You don’t understand what you’re asking. Just being back on this planet makes my blood boil. It’s a broken planet full of broken people.”

“You’re right. There’s no way I can possibly understand the things that happened to you here. But I do know how to talk to scum to elicit the information I need.”

Anakin gave her a fake smile. “Speaking of scum, here comes Watto.”

Watto handed him the hand-scribbled coordinates of the Lars’ farm and cleared his throat. “I hope you find her Ani.”

“Thank you Watto.”

* * *

They stepped out of the Nubian ship and started walking toward the igloo shaped structure when they were approached by a dust covered protocol droid.

“Oh, Hello. How might I be of service? I am C—"

“Threepio?” Anakin finished for him.

Threepio looked as stunned as any droid could be. “Master Ani, I knew you would return!”

“I’m glad to see you Threepio but I’m here for my mother.”

“I think perhaps we should go inside, please follow me,” said Threepio as he shuffled toward the structure.

The three of them finally made their way inside and ran into a young man and woman roughly their age.

Anakin wasted no time in introducing himself, “I’m Anakin Skywalker.”

The young man nervously shifted. “Owen Lars. This is my girlfriend Beru.”

Beru greeted them with a smile and a wave.

“I guess I’m your stepbrother. I had a feeling you might show up some day.”

Anakin could feel the stress radiating off Owen. There was something he wasn’t being told.

Anakin was starting to become more antsy. “Where is my mother?”

An unfamiliar voice called out from behind them. “Unfortunately, she’s not here.”

Anakin turned to see a bearded man in a hover chair who was missing a leg.

Reaching out his hand the man said “Cliegg Lars. Shmi is my wife. I believe we have a lot to talk about. Follow me, I’ll get you all something to eat.”

…

Over dinner Cliegg told Anakin the whole story of what happened to his mother. He told Anakin that he’d done everything that he could to rescue her, but the end result was the death of over 20 people and the loss of his leg. Anakin wasn’t ready to give up on her.

* * *

Anakin exits the shelter and looks toward the binary sunset. Everything felt hopeless. Tatoonie had a way of doing that he supposed. Despite what Cliegg had told him he knew he couldn’t give up on his mother. She was a fighter. Tearing his gaze away from the sunset he began to load up the Lars’ speeder bike with a few supplies. He didn’t know how long he would be gone so he decided to pack ample food and water.

Padme steps out of the hut and looks to Anakin. Immediately he could sense her soothing presence.

“You’re going to have to stay here. These are good people Padme. You’ll be safe. I have to go.”

Padme stretches out her arms to give him a hug. “I know you do. It’s not my safety that I’m worried about. Be careful out there.”

He returned the favor wrapping his arms around her only for her to give him a kiss on the cheek. Somehow, he was able to produce a smile.

“What was that for?”

“For good luck. Now go find your mother Ani.”

Anakin got on the speeder bike and hit the accelerator. His mind and heart were racing. After listening to Cliegg talk about Shmi it was obvious that he loved her. Anakin could at least be happy that she had someone in his absence. Cliegg lost his leg trying to rescue Shmi. The fact that they had accepted his mother into their family meant more to Anakin than they could ever know. Cliegg had told him that Shmi was dead and that he needed to accept that, but he would not give up that easily.

He was only given a general direction by the Lars, but it was more than enough. He could feel the force coursing through him and directing him where to go.

A few hours later he found himself at the edge of a Tusken camp. They had set up camp in a small canyon surrounded by tall, jagged rock formations. He immediately went for the high ground to scope out the camp. There were about 40 tents scattered haphazardly around the compound. This wasn’t going to be easy. Luckily, most of the raiders had already turned in for the night. There were several groups of raiders patrolling the camp and a few Massiffs that were fighting over leftover meat.

Anakin dropped to his knees and lowered his head. He cleared his mind and reached out with the force. He latched on to the memory of his mother. A few minutes later he felt her faint force signature coming from a tent near the rear of the camp.

He jumped down from his perch and stealthily approached the tent, careful not to alert the Massiffs. Anakin ignited his lightsaber and cut a hole in the tent just large enough to pass through when his heart dropped. There was his mother. She was bound and had several large gashes across her face.

He rushed over to her and quickly unbound her hands. Dropping to his knees he propped her up in his arms. Fading in and out of consciousness she asked, “Ani? Is it truly you?”

“It’s me Mom. I’m here. You’re safe now.” Tears began to form in his eyes as he scanned the wounds on her blood covered face.

How could anyone do this to someone else? The raiders are animals!

She lifted her hands and touched his face. “My grown-up son. I’m so proud of you.”

“I missed you so much mom. I should’ve never left you.”

“I saw it Ani. It was beautiful.”

“What did you see Mom? What was beautiful?”

“Ashla. She is the key. She will bring you peace.”

His throat began to tighten up. “Mom what are you saying? Who is Ashla?”

Her eyes were starting to glass over. “Now I am complete. I love you Ani, you must find Ash--”

He felt the exact moment when her body went limp. “No, mom. No! Stay with me. I love you. Please!” He closed her eyes and began to cry profusely pressing his forehead against hers. “I’m so sorry mom. I failed you.”

He had been through so much pain in his life but never this. This was different. This pain had a permanent feel to it. He was drowning in misery when suddenly he felt nothing. It was time to put purpose over pain. This will never happen to anyone again. He was going to make sure of that. He set his mother down gently and moved toward the entrance.

There was a raider standing guard on both sides of the entrance. Before they could react, he ignited his lightsaber and with two swift strikes they dropped to the ground. Hearing the commotion, another raider turned and lifted his Gaffi stick in defense just in time for the hot plasma blade to pass right through his weapon and his neck. The rest of the camp quickly realized what was happening and the animals began pouring out of their tents. The raiders charged him one after the other and one after the other they were cut down with ease.

He was a whirlwind of fury. In this moment he was invincible.

Soon he found himself surrounded by raiders from every angle. He was able to pick a few of them off before the others managed to land a couple strikes. This was a mistake. His rage exploded. Calling on the force he lifted all of them at once and slammed them back down with enough force to shatter their bones.

Among the chaos, he saw the chieftain attempting to flee. Using the force, Anakin picked him up and smashed him into the canyon wall pinning him there. “No! You didn’t show my mother mercy and I will not show you mercy!” He slowly moved toward the chieftain, allowing his lightsaber to drag the sand leaving behind a thin layer of glass. “I HATE YOU!” He impaled the chieftain through the chest and let him drop. With the chieftain’s death he was left with a bone-chilling silence and the reality of what he’d just done. They were all dead. Every single one of them.

He made his way back to his mother’s tent, picked up her lifeless body and placed her on the speeder. He returned to his scouting point and focused all his power on the nearby canyon walls sending an avalanche of rocks and boulders into the camp reducing it to rubble.

* * *

Master Yoda raised his short arms in order to silence the excited chatter of his students.

“Time for class to begin it is. Your meditations you may start.”

Ahsoka took a deep breath.

_There is only peace._

_There is only harmony._

_There is only serenity._

Everything around her began to fade and she found herself in a large but empty room. It was eerily quiet. After quickly scanning her surroundings she began to explore the room until she heard a barely distinguishable sound. When she turned to face the sound, she noticed that a door had appeared. She began to creep toward it. As she got closer, she realized the sound she had heard was weeping.

Placing her hand on the door she slowly pushed it open. When she saw what was inside, she immediately wished she hadn’t. She saw a young man on his knees holding a middle-aged woman in his arms. Tears were freely flowing down his face. “No, mom. No! Stay with me. I love you. Please!” The sorrow in his wavering voice overwhelmed her. He pressed his forehead against the woman’s.

“Anakin?” she asked.

He gave the lifeless woman a hug and carefully laid her down before closing her eyes. He raised his head and looked right at Ahsoka, tears still falling. An almost unbearable sadness washed over her. His normally bright blue eyes now had specks of amber in them.

“Anakin, I’m so sorry,” she said trying to hold back her own tears.

His jaw clenched and the tears suddenly stopped. A wave of coldness hit her. She felt something from him that she’d never felt before. Hatred. He stood up and started walking toward her moving a hand to his lightsaber. She was terrified.

“Anakin! Stop! Please!” It was clear he either couldn’t hear her or wasn’t going to stop.

Still moving toward her, he drew his saber and she squeezed her eyes shut preparing for the worst. She heard it ignite behind her and spun around to witness two sand people lifelessly drop to the ground. Before she could react, he sliced through several more sand people.

She could only hear his lightsaber tearing through the air and the helpless screams. She sank to the ground herself pulling her head between her knees and trying to cover her montrals to block out the sound to no avail.

“I HATE YOU!”

That was her breaking point. She burst into tears and was sobbing uncontrollably when she heard another voice. “Youngling Tano. Time to awaken it is.”

Gasping back to reality, her wet eyes snapped open to the room full of younglings that were now staring at her. She looked down to find Master Yoda standing in front of her.

“Master, I—” she started to say.

Yoda cleared his throat and addressed the entire class, “Come to an end this class has. Return to your quarters you may. Ahsoka, stay you must. Get to the bottom of this we will.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Finally some action. If anyone is interested in beta-reading please shoot me an email at darthfulcrum66 @gmail.com.


	6. Broken Promises

Soon all the younglings had left the meditation room leaving Ahsoka and Master Yoda alone. Ahsoka’s heart was still pounding in response to the flood of emotions she’d been subjected to. She closed her eyes and tried to calm her panicked breathing.

Finally, Yoda broke the silence. “Something terrible has happened. Young Skywalker is in pain. Terrible pain.”

She nodded. “Yes, Master. I had a vision.”

Yoda’s forehead creased as it would have if he had eyebrows to raise. “Share this vision, you would like to?”

She looked away feeling as if she were about to choke up, “I saw Anakin holding his mother. She died in his arms. I felt his emotions as if they were my own. He was unbearably sad.”

“See anything else did you, hmm?”

Ahsoka’s mind was racing. Was she supposed to tell Yoda the full truth? How could she tell Yoda that Anakin Skywalker, the chosen one, had slaughtered an entire village in cold blood. Even worse, how could she tell Yoda that for a split second she understood why he did it?

“Nope. That was all.” She really hoped that he wouldn’t press her on this.

Yoda gave her a questioning glance. “Close to padawan Skywalker are you, hmm?”

Her lekku brightened. “No! I mean I don’t know; we’ve spoken a few times. Occasionally I can feel him in the Force. Sometimes I can sense him when he’s on a different planet.”

Yoda studied her face. “Formed a powerful bond, you have. A bond of this strength takes many years to achieve. Mysterious are the ways of the Force. To your dormitory you may return. Much to think about, I have.”

Ahsoka quickly nodded and exited the room.

Yoda sat in silence pondering their conversation. It was clear she wasn’t telling him everything, but he wasn’t going to push her in the state she was in.

Yoda felt a familiar warmth pass over him.

“Something to say my old friend, do you have, hmm?”

Yoda opened his eyes to the refreshing blue hue of Qui-Gon Jinn’s Force ghost. 

The specter gave a small bow before saying, “Greetings Master. Instantaneous Force bonds are quite rare but not entirely unheard of. As I recall, Master Vos formed a bond with his padawan instantly. In this case it seems that the Force has brought the two of them together for reasons we can’t possibly fathom. I do not, however, believe that the Force is capable of making a mistake.”

“Something more to add you have?”

“I have watched Anakin grow up in many ways since my death. It may seem unorthodox for a Jedi to draw their strength from others, but Anakin is the chosen one. I propose that he is knighted and takes the young Togruta as his padawan. I do not believe we should keep the two of them apart.”

Yoda’s eyes went wide.

“Careful we must be when exceptions are made, Qui-Gon.”

The specter gave a sincere smile. “Master if I may, the Jedi order is built on exceptions. Anakin is simply held to a higher standard because of his title.”

Yoda reflected on the statement before finally nodding. “Much truth there is in what you have said my old friend. Meditate on these things I will.”

…

* * *

Anakin was working on a vaporator when Padme entered the workshop with a tray of food.

Padme sent Anakin a warm smile. “I brought you something.”

Anakin didn’t look up from his work or acknowledge what she’d said.

“I never should’ve left her.”

“Ani, its not your fault. You know she is proud of you.”

He threw the spanner across the room and Padme winced at the crash.

“That wasn’t worth losing her! I became a Jedi to help people and all its brought me is pain.”

She moved toward Anakin and pushed his chin up forcing him to look into her eyes. When she saw the hopeless expression on his face, she couldn’t stop herself from wrapping him in a hug. Padme didn’t have to be force sensitive to feel the pain radiating from him.

Anakin’s voice wavered. “Someday I will be the most powerful Jedi to ever live. I will even learn to stop people from dying.”

“Death is a natural part of life Ani. I know it’s hard to accept but when a loved one passes away you have to continue living for them. Allow their memory to guide you and pass on what they’ve taught you. The body may no longer be here, but the spirit never dies.”

…

Cliegg was giving Shmi’s eulogy but Anakin couldn’t make himself listen to it. Instead, he quietly let his mind wander as he stared at his mother’s grave. When Cliegg finished speaking, Anakin fell to his knees and placed his hand on her gravestone. “I wasn’t strong enough to save you mom. I wasn’t strong enough. But I promise, I won’t fail again. I miss you so much. I’m so sorry.”

Anakin looked up when he heard the frantic binary trilling. He stood up and met the sassy astromech that was trudging through the sand.

“Artoo, we told you to stay with the ship.”

The droid let out another rapid succession of beeps.

“What? Obi-Wan is in trouble?”

Anakin turned his attention back to the Lars’.

“Thank you for everything you’ve done for my mother.”

* * *

…

Anakin, Padme, and Obi-Wan found themselves bound to 3 pillars in the middle of the Geonosian arena.

Kenobi rolled his eyes at the sight of Anakin and Padme. “Anakin? I was beginning to worry you hadn’t got my message but now I see that you simply disobeyed as usual.”

“We got your message and retransmitted it as you requested. Then we decided to come rescue you Master.”

Obi-Wan glanced up and down at the pillars that Anakin and Padme were bound to. “Oh. Well in that case, good job.”

…

Anakin jumped over the charging reek, kicked off the pillar and landed on the creature’s back. He quickly used the reek’s central horn to break the chain that was binding him to the pillar. He used the Force to calm the creature before using the chain as a rein to control it. Guiding the beast around the arena he picked up Padme and Obi-Wan.

As soon as they were beginning to gain the upper hand, they found themselves surrounded by eight destroyers. “Uh-Oh. This is not good,” Kenobi said.

Anakin looked up toward Count Dooku when he spotted a purple streak of light moving through the air. Mace Windu and hundreds of other Jedi landed on the arena floor igniting their lightsabers. Thousands of battle droids began to pour in, illuminating the colosseum with blaster fire. Anakin spurred the reek toward several fallen Jedi and summoned their weapons to his hands.

“I guess they won’t be needing these,” Anakin said before tossing a lightsaber to Kenobi who in turn flipped off the beast and started slicing through droids.

“Anakin, you must protect Senator Amidala! Get her out of here!”

He scanned the arena and spotted an exit that hadn’t been barricaded yet. He spurred the beast into motion again, but a nearby explosion ejected them. Anakin recovered midair and landed his jump gracefully, but Padme tumbled a couple of meters.

“Senator Amidala, behind me!” Windu ordered as he stepped in front of Padme and took a defensive position deflecting the bolts of energy leaving Anakin to defend the rear.

The reek blazed a path of destruction through the platoon of droids in front of Mace making room for the beskar-clad bounty hunter to touch down. Jango began a rapid-fire assault on the Jedi master. Windu had no problem deflecting the bolts as the determined bounty hunter continued to advance toward him. Without warning, Fett dove right just as the beast barreled through, catching Windu off-guard and sending him to the ground.

Anakin was busy defending the six o’clock from another platoon when he felt Padme’s distress and spun around just in time to see Jango expertly place two shots into her abdomen. “No! Padme!” Instantly forgetting he was in the middle of a warzone he dropped the lightsaber and caught the falling senator in his arms.

She grimaced in pain before murmuring, “Anakin, you can’t give up. Seek justice, not vengeance.” She swallowed hard and gestured toward her shirt collar as if she wanted to show him something. He noticed the tucked-in string and gently pulled it up through the neck of her tattered shirt revealing the small ivory wood carving he’d given to her when they’d first met. Padme smiled and a single tear ran down her face.

Anakin dropped his head to hers. His mouth was suddenly dry. He tried to speak but no words came out. He couldn’t do anything except let the tears fall. It took all her remaining strength to grip the carving and hold it close to her chest as she closed her eyes.

By the time he gathered the strength to look up from her, Windu was standing over the headless body of the bounty hunter.

Windu turned toward them to see Anakin on his knees clutching Padme’s lifeless body surrounded by a sphere of hundreds of blaster bolts frozen in place. Anakin was staring at him as if he were in a trance.

“Skywalker, I’m—”

Windu was interrupted by the roar of repulsorlift engines. The sky darkened as hundreds of LAAT gunships flew overhead wreaking havoc on the droids. Windu flinched as all the bolts that were frozen in place zipped back toward their origin, obliterating the droids that fired them.

Obi-Wan ran over to Anakin and knelt beside of him. He looked down at the senator’s body and then up at his padawan’s face. Obi-Wan placed his hand on Anakin’s shoulder causing him to finally break his gaze with Windu.

“I failed her Master. I failed my mother and now I’ve failed Padme.” Anakin’s voice trembled.

“Anakin, I’m so sorry. There will be a time to mourn but we cannot afford it right now. Dooku is escaping. We can end this war before it begins.”

Two gunships landed several meters from them and opened their portside doors allowing a squadron of clones to step out.

Anakin shook his head. “Master, I can’t leave her.”

“What would Padme do if she was in your position?”

Anakin looked back down to Padme’s body. He thought back to the words that Padme had said to him just a few days ago. Her legacy was going to have to live on through him. His face tightened as he cradled her body and picked her up. “She would do her duty,” he said coldly.

Anakin stepped inside the first LAAT and gently placed her on a stretcher. He turned his attention to the clone standing just outside.

“Take her to Coruscant ASAP. Inform Senator Organa of what happened here.”

“Sir, the 501st Battalion has strict orders—”

His voice faltered. “Please.”

It seemed as if the trooper was going to protest but changed his mind after seeing the look on Anakin’s face. “Yes sir.”

Anakin stepped out of the first gunship and joined Obi-Wan on the other. The door slid shut and they were off.

* * *

Kenobi silently studied Anakin’s face as they raced after Dooku.

“You know sometimes I feel like I failed Qui-Gon. I feel like I’m the reason he’s not here.”

Anakin seemed to break from his trance to look back at his master.

After a moment he asked, “How do you deal with it?”

“I do everything I can to honor his memory. With his dying breath, Qui-Gon asked me to train you. Now you’ve grown strong and wise and you are a far greater Jedi than I could hope to be. I know that he would be proud of the man you’ve become and that gives me peace. The pain never completely fades but I promise it will get better my friend.”

…

Anakin and Obi-Wan jump from the gunship to the platform and run inside to confront Dooku.

“You’re going to pay for what you did today,” Anakin said as his green blade jumped into existence with a snap-hiss.

Kenobi shook his head at his padawan and replied, “Anakin, relax. We will take him together.”

“I’m taking him now!”

“No! Stop!”

Anakin lunged toward Dooku with a burst of speed. Kenobi gritted his teeth as his apprentice was caught in a gut-wrenching display of Sith lightning and tossed aside.

Dooku grinned at him. “Well, now the adults can talk. Master Kenobi, as you see my Jedi powers far surpass yours. You would be wise to surrender.”

Obi-Wan closed the distance as the Sith lord fired a volley of lightning that was effortlessly absorbed by Kenobi’s saber.

“I don’t think so.”

Dooku summoned his lightsaber to his hand. “I don’t want to do this, but you leave me little choice.” With a crack-hum his red-white blade sprang into life.

Anakin watched his master fight valiantly but ultimately; he was no match for Dooku’s Form II expertise. With a flick of his wrist Dooku disarmed Kenobi and Force pushed him into the wall knocking him unconscious.

As much as he wanted to Anakin just couldn’t make his body move. In the span of several days, he’d lost the woman of his dreams, his mother and he was about to lose his best friend. He tried to push the thought aside and let go of his emotions, but it was no use. Count Dooku stood over Obi-Wan and raised his lightsaber for a killing blow. The sight filled Anakin with intense hatred. Instead of letting go he embraced it.

“I’m sorry my old friend.”

Dooku brought the saber down but it was intercepted by a flash of green. The Sith lord was surprised to see a pair bright yellow eyes glaring at him.

“Brave of you boy, I figured you would’ve learned your lesson.”

“You will not leave this place Dooku.”

“We will see about that.”

Dooku spun away from Anakin and directed his blade toward the ground as if taunting the young Jedi. Anakin threw himself at the Sith lord unleashing a flurry of powerful strikes. As the duel went on Anakin found his strength constantly being renewed by the hatred that was pumping through him. The shear inertia behind Anakin’s attacks sent Dooku’s lightsaber flying. Dooku scampered backwards and grinned at him.

“Good, Skywalker! Good! I can feel the anger coursing through you.”

Dooku used the Force to hurl nearby storage crates at him but with an effortless flick of his wrist Anakin redirected them.

“Enough of this. You killed her and I will make you pay for it,” Anakin snarled.

“Revenge is not the way of the Jedi. I don’t believe Senator Amidala would seek out revenge.”

Anakin gritted his teeth and his eyes burned with anger. “You do not speak for her!”

He reached out with the Force and violently threw Dooku against the wall. Dooku slumped to the ground and sent another volley of lightning at Anakin. This time he was prepared and caught it with his lightsaber. Anakin continued his approach; Dooku’s cocky demeanor was replaced with fear as he realized he’d lost. With a quick slash, the green blade found Dooku’s arms.

Anakin stood over the Sith lord and used the Force to lift him up by his neck. Dooku began to choke as Anakin readied his lightsaber for the killing blow when a soft voice stopped him in his tracks.

“Anakin, I know you’re upset but don’t do this. You’re better than this.”

The voice sent shivers down his spine. He was completely frozen but didn’t release his grip on Dooku. He looked over his shoulder to see Ahsoka standing in the middle of the empty chamber. Suddenly he was so embarrassed by what he was doing. This wasn’t the Jedi way. He disengaged his lightsaber and allowed Dooku to fall to the floor with a thud.

“Ahsoka, what are you doing here?”

Anakin’s glowing yellow eyes faded to blue as Ahsoka approached him.

She smirked and replied, “Master Yoda asked me to come with him to Geonosis. I figured if you were here, you’d probably need saving.”

Slowly Master Yoda hobbled his way into the chamber accompanied by a squadron of clones.

“Arrested, Count Dooku will be. A great service to the republic you have done, padawan Skywalker.”

Ahsoka looked down at the dismembered Sith Lord.

“Well, it looks like we won’t be needing any handcuffs.”

…

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was a difficult chapter to write. It's a bit longer than normal but I didn't want to break this up. The next chapter's are really where the continuity differences are going to occur. PS: Ellipses indicate a passage of time where the original canon events unfolded. As usual, if anyone is interested in beta reading shoot me an email at darthfulcrum66@gmail.com


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